Question: Who was the injury reported to?
Answer: First to Jesus, then to [our company.]
Okay... I can understand if that may have been his answer. However, I'm not sure if I would have written it out on the official injury report...
Continuing on, I came to another interesting answer.
Question: How could this incident have been avoided?
Answer: It could have been avoided if I did not pull from the handle. (Note: I was instructed by Jesus to pull from the handle.)
Okay. At this point I was feeling like this was getting a bit ridiculous. I understand there are many people in the world who are very in tune with their religious beliefs. But, really? This seemed like a pretty odd variant of "the devil made me do it." I don't feel like this would hold up in any kind of worker's compensation claim.
As my neighboring coworkers had already gone home for the evening, I sat there, wondering aloud to myself and being generally distraught and quite confused about this report for a good long while.
Then, as if it fell from Heaven, I was struck by a very important detail that I had been overlooking the entire time:
I live and work in Southern California where there are many, many Hispanic males named "Jesus."
Thank you, Christian college.
