"So the other day my chiropractor shoved his hand up my mouth and readjusted my brain because my eyes were popping out of their sockets and now I can concentrate better." --My sister
I told her that her chiropractor was surely being facetious. She told me nobody ever believes this story. Do you blame them? Where I'm from, throats travel from north to south, rendering the act of shoving a hand UP a mouth blatantly mythological, or, at the very least, pretty ding-dang-dong dangerous.
But that's neither here nor there. Next run-on:
"Somebody wrote 'honk if you're horny' on our car after we got married but only one person honked because I accidentally cut them off because there was so much freaking paint on our windows." --A coworker
I told him that that was one of the best run-ons I'd ever heard. He told me that run-ons are his literary strength. Also, that his wife's spiritual gifts are cooking and bocce ball.
Liz Danzico on Merlin Mann on Anne Lamott on Haruki Murakami on great sentences:
"I couldn’t really place the sentence on my great sentences list because while it’s mostly grammatically sound and includes words and punctuation, it did not meet my own requirements of having a large foam cowboy hat, nor was it about how broccoli looks like little trees, nor did it create a fort made of sofa cushions in which I could enjoy the sentences included in my proper list of great sentences."
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